Are You Too “Obsessed” With Getting Pregnant?

During my 15-year journey with infertility, one piece of advice from friends and family stood out for its frequency and frustration: “Just relax, and it’ll happen.” More than once, someone suggested that getting drunk might help. Here are a few other common comments I heard:

• “You’re thinking about it too much.”

• “Take a holiday, and you’ll come back pregnant—that’s what happened to me!”

•  “You just need to stop obsessing.”
  

  

  
  

It would be wonderful if getting pregnant was as simple as a shot of tequila and a passionate night. For some women, it is. But for many others, achieving pregnancy requires effort: waking up early to take your temperature, using countless ovulation tests, examining your cervical mucus daily, and planning intercourse around your ovulation schedule.

At Calm Fertility Care, we understand that stress can significantly impact fertility. Elevated stress levels can raise the hormone prolactin, creating a natural barrier to conception. Ironically, the well-meaning suggestions from friends and family often exacerbate this stress rather than alleviate it.

Some women conceive quickly, while others do not. Being in the latter group doesn’t mean you’re less of a woman, obsessed, or broken. It simply means your journey to pregnancy is more challenging, prompting you to take proactive steps. Even the woman who conceived on her first try would likely become just as dedicated if she were facing her fourth cycle with no positive pregnancy test.

It’s nearly impossible to be casual about getting pregnant when it doesn’t happen right away. When someone tells you to stop trying so hard, it implies that you’re a baby-obsessed loser who enjoys meticulously charting cervical mucus and temperature. It suggests that if you truly deserved to get pregnant, it would happen effortlessly. This unrealistic expectation ignores the reality of many women’s experiences.

You are not that carefree girl who gets pregnant effortlessly, and that’s okay. Your worth isn’t determined by how quickly you conceive. There is no shame in longing to be a parent. It requires bravery, vulnerability, and effort—traits that are essential for many of life’s most worthwhile endeavours.

Society often pressures women to downplay their desires, to appear laid back and unambitious. This is a trap. Truly living means acknowledging what you want and striving for it, despite uncertainty. Falling in love, excelling in your career, and having a baby all demand this kind of courage and dedication.

At Calm Fertility Care, we recognise the complexities and emotional challenges of the fertility journey. We’re here to support you with compassion and expertise, helping you navigate this path with resilience and hope. For those seeking fertility treatment in Northern Ireland, Calm Fertility Care offers tailored solutions to meet your unique needs, providing comprehensive support every step of the way.

In summary, fertility treatment in Northern Ireland requires dedication and persistence. The journey can be emotionally taxing, but you don’t have to face it alone. Calm Fertility Care is committed to helping you achieve your dream of parenthood with personalised care and understanding. Remember, there is no shame in seeking help and striving for what you deeply desire.